Saturday, August 4, 2012

Dom: an Accurate Portrayal

Birder fare: "Dom eating beans, consumed with madness" - Timothy Snieder 

Taken from: http://theragingbirder.blogspot.ca/2012/05/sounds-of-sage.html

Why I can no longer enjoy a nice tuna sandwich!

In Australia, living on meager funds is hard. DAMN hard. I don't know what it is about Australians. Apparently evolution has devoid the whole continent of any crops unless they're produced for only the wealthy to consume.
I once remember buying 5 bananas for $27. I then learnt my lesson so I checked EVERY piece of produce carefully as it went through the check-out. You can be damn sure I caught the $33 watermelon that I was salivating for. I guess it was going to be reduced Kangaroo steaks and open packages of pasta for me that night!

Anyways, more on the topic of this blog. It is difficult living on the road in any circumstances (except New Zealand, where when you finally think you will succumb to scurvy a magical fruit stand appears with every possible delicious fruit in abundance, and where you can LITERALLY fill the back seat of your car with produce for $14. And then feel the wrath of having meals consisting of only fibre. Yet, when one lives on the road, let it be known, that the world is not just your oyster, it is also your bathroom.) but in Australia we found it particularly tough. The heat, the expense, and the insects made even the most idealistic camping areas difficult. So, one turns often to the most magical of canned fishes, the tuna.

If there is one thing that Australians got right, it is definitely not beer. Okay... so what they DID get right was tuna! Walk into any Woolworth's, Coles, or corner store, and I guarantee more than half of a long American-sized grocery aisle is devoted to these majestic creatures that we are eating to extinction. (Sidenote: a whole aisle is devoted to bagged wine affectionately known as Goons, aborigine for pillow as you drink yourself into oblivion and make any sidewalk or beach your bed). Forget just "Lemon & Pepper", "Sea Salt & Cracked Pepper"! Think red, yellow and green curry varieties! Italian, Spanish and Thai mixes! Sweet chili, spicy chili, any type of chili! When you first lay your eyes upon these "beauts" you can't possibly fathom ever getting tired of these flavours! Open a can of a new flavour yet unexplored by your palate, you can not wait to have it again for breakfast the next morning!

Two weeks go by. Still eating $1.25 whole wheat bread (because if you can dish out money for anything, its the extra $0.25 for the upgrade from white bread) and on a diet of 3 cans of tuna a day. 5 if it's been a extra long hiking day. Your mind dreams of a nice steak, a warm roast, steamed vegetables, and cold fruits.
Unfortunately, the only thing that comes close to this that is even in the realm of your budget is rotisserie chicken.

I WISH I HAD A PICTURE OF THIS! After 4 weeks of eating like a "povo" (watch Summer Heights High to get this joke), a $10 chicken was a feast we indulged ourselves in. Siting in the Woolworth's parking lot somewhere in the Daintree Rainforest, 10 AM but still 40 degrees out with humidity, we sat our behinds on a parking curb and ate with no utensils, no napkins and absolutely NO sense of dignity. Chicken grease running down our faces and our hands, with a bucket of yogurt to wash it down, we were kings for that moment. Also, the talk of the town surely! But one thing mattered, and one thing only. It wasn't tuna.

The All Important First Blog!

Alrighty, this blog won't be serious in any way! It will just demonstrate to all y'all the extreme lengths that us crazy birders go to see our feathered friends!
The:
- awful meals comprised solely of carbs and dehydrated meat
- the random places we rest our heads to sleep (until 4 AM... because then its birdin' time)
- the crazy kilometers we put on cars that really should only be used for city driving
- AND... the glorious conquests! The birds that we spend so many $'s on to see, deprive ourselves of sleep for, trespass for, watch with ripped khakis, blood and sweat stained t-shirts, aaand $1000 binoculars.

To all those crazy times, there will (hopefully) be a post!